Thank you Jesus for Breast milk?!?!.. is that weird ;)

So the last time I posted I think I shared how cutting my child's fingernails felt like an accomplishment to me, a huge one at that. Well let me just tell you things have been a little crazier around here since those little finger nail clippings. I have had some of the hardest times as a mom for almost two months now.
 Moriah our now 5 month old was having the hardest time nursing so soon after I noticed her frustrations and mine I thought I needed to start giving her formula in addition to nursing her.  I had the guilt of not nursing her but then needed my sanity and let go of the guilt. With Moriah I was determined to nurse her the longest and was looking forward to it.  ((with my boys- due to working full time with Cohen and  Conrad I felt wasn't getting enough and we had just moved to Haiti and I was worried so just started adding formula)) My boys had no problem took the formula and nursed until it got to the point they were doing it maybe once a day (6 months and 9 months) so then they were just getting all  formula. It was hard for me and I felt guilty but then thought they are being fed and doing well and soon the guilt was gone.
Moriah was not content one bit with formula and I tried three different kinds. So I then was looking into ways to bring my milk in and started pumping all day to help bring my milk in. I was trying to self diagnose my daughters issues and try to figure out what was wrong with her. I was seriously so overwhelmed and tired and would nurse her give her formula even though it upset her then I would go pump. My boys ((ages 2 and 3)) were like two little wild animals going crazy in the house while I was being consumed with figuring out how to nurse Moriah. Turns out they would even make it harder for me to nurse her because I am a human jungle gym to them especially my 2 year old. She was so distracted and that made nursing through a hard time even harder.
To wrap this up ((even though I could write a book on my frustrations))- with tons of great advice from friends, family members, The snap mom community, The Breastfeeding Center, and most importantly PRAYER, patience and endurance that comes from none other than the Lord Jesus Christ :) I have made it out alive of this dry spell and Moriah is a fighter she has managed to continue to strictly breastfeed and we are going on three solid days with no supplementing of formula and I am so THANKFUL and proud! Just even this past Friday I was so frustrated and gave Moriah formula for the last time I texted my mom and had told my sisters I was so over nursing. It is still not the easiest thing to do right now but I am so glad and want to give thanks and the Glory to God for the change I have seen these last couple days. I feel so much better and plus the sun was shining these last couple days in Ohio which makes it all even better!  So YES THANK YOU JESUS FOR BREASTMILK!! And don't judge me if Moriah nurses for 5 years ;) we fought hard to keep that milk coming in!

Philippians 4: 10-13
 I rejoiced greatly in the Lord that at last you renewed your concern for me. Indeed, you were concerned, but you had no opportunity to show it.  I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.  I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.  I can do all this through him who gives me strength.


I have to say also that I am thankful for my husband and his support and times like these my heart goes out to single parents who are doing it on their own most the time, you guys rock! Praying for strength to single parents today!


** disclaimers:
**I totally would have given into formula if she had allowed it, realizing now my milk did this with my boys also and they transitioned to the formula fine so I didn't have to fight for my milk supply like I did this time, but it has given me a new found appreciation for nursing and I am so thankful I made it through. I thought being a stay at home mom and back in the states nursing was going to be so easy but now I know with two little boys needing my attention nursing is a struggle at times but I am even more encouraged to fight through it and continue to nurse as long as I can. I realize now it is a gift and some people don't make it through the struggle of nursing like how I was with my boys. So don't feel guilty about it I think we as mothers have a lot of guilt and we shouldn't do that. But for me this time around I am thankful that she wouldn't take the formula because it made me keep at nursing and trying to bring in my milk.

**in the end what worked best for me was pumping after each time I nursed her and nursing her whenever she would let me and I was taking fenugreek that I picked up from Vitanet. I made sure to drink lots of water and I tried to eat more realizing sometimes I would make lunch for my boys sit to nurse her and not sit and eat as much as I should so I am trying to do that as well.

**I encourage anyone who does want to continue nursing to keep at it and talk to others who have gone through it because my friends and family were really the most helpful and I am thankful for them!

Praying and thinking of anyone else going through this right now!

Thank You Jesus!

   We are so quick at times to ask for prayer as soon as the slightest need comes up.  Jesus wants us to come to Him at all times, every day. Not just when there is a need, we are afraid, or if one of us gets sick.  He wants our conversation to be so often, he wants us to be His very best friend. He knows our thoughts and our deepest needs before we even tell Him.  He is just waiting for us to open up our hearts to Him. I also think sometimes he is waiting for a THANK YOU.

  We make sure the girls always say "Please" and "Thank You."  We ask of Cohen to say Please and Thank You for just about anything { it's really cute } but more importantly we want him to learn to be appreciative of things. Lately he has been saying it without us telling him.  When I give him anything like a cup to play with in the bath, open the door for him, or today when I helped him jump over a cement block that we cross everyday when walking into the orphanage, he just looks at me in his little cute not at all baby voice and says "Thank You Mom" and oh my goodness......my heart melts. It is the simplest phrase but it means so much. Eric and I both always love when he does this and we always share with each other if one is not around, or even if we are both there we will say "did you hear him!?"

So if we get that excited from it, how much more do you think it melts the heart of our Father.
  
    I was thinking of how that last couple months before our move here all my prayers were, Jesus please keep us safe, Jesus please provide for us, Jesus please keep the boys healthy, Jesus please take away all my doubts and fears. Not saying I still don't add those things in but I don't at all feel afraid being here.  I was more afraid living in the states when Eric would have to travel for basketball then I have been here at all.  I am not worried my children are going to get sick every time they take a bath from the water. :)

  I also know we asked of many of you to pray with us for those things and for our transition here. I want to make sure you don't stop praying for us by any means..... :) but so you know that He has heard our prayer and we want to Thank You for praying, but most importantly Thank Him and Praise Him.

For from HIM, Through HIM and to HIM are all things. For HIM be the glory forever!  Amen. 

Romans 11:36  

  Thank you Jesus for this day, Thank you for your provision in our lives, Thank you for bringing us to Haiti, Thank you for our marriage and the love we share, Thank you for our healthy boys and for coming before us in Haiti and meeting us here and our every need. Thank you for the girls and our staff, Thank you for allowing us to grow closer to you during this time and as a family. Thank you for Jared and Jalayne and for helping us and for the very special time we have been able to spend together, Thank you for surrounding us with so many friends and family that love us and truly care for us, Thank you for those who are praying for us everyday and when ever they think of us, Thank you for those who are financially giving to meet our needs here, Thank you for our health, Thank you for a home, Thank you for making this the smoothest transition in the world for us, Thank You that you are not even close to being finished with us, Thank you that you love us so much, Thank you for allowing us to see how much you love us, Thank You for who you are, Thank you for freedom to serve you in Haiti, Thank you for allowing us to learn the language, Thank you for generators, Thank you for fans, Thank you for rice, Thank you for clean water to drink,  Thank you for computers, phones, and skype. Thank you for CFM trusting us to be here, Thank you for visitors, Thank you for comfort when we are missing out on births of new babies from people we love, and for comfort and peace when a brother was in ICU, Thank you for very dear friends of ours who are going to soon be parents. Thank you for comforting us and family during the many transitions we have gone through on both sides in the last couple months. Thank you for supportive and praying churches, Thank you for praying parents! Thank you for PEACE and GRACE.  {We are so blessed and we are so loved by our Heavenly Father} Thank you for answering every prayer we prayed leading up to us being here and since we have been here. Thank you that because of who You are we do not have to live in fear.
Thank You Jesus So Much!  WE LOVE YOU!    
Amen.


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